Sunday, December 5, 2010

New Ties, Breaking Ties, Nuances of Life...

It's interesting to me, how life seems to fly by at the blink of an eye. The Lord has me in Ezekiel, and Habakkuk, and Malachi. I left my Thursday evening Bible Study group. Just felt so led to go deeper with God, and felt that He was asking me to nest with Him, silent, in the stillness. It's hard to explain. I'm actually not as lonely as I was afraid I would be. I enjoy living alone, I have discovered. I love the fact that it is quiet, and peaceful, and still when I need it to be. After the past two weeks of falling asleep by 8:30pm, last night I was awake until 10 or 11pm. Then I woke up at 2:30am. How strange. I was definitely awake for a reason, and for some reason kept having thoughts of all the HUGE mistakes I've made in my life thus far. It was interesting, to say the least. After an hour of tossing and turning, struggling to fall back asleep, I rolled over onto my back, lay there, shut my eyes, and begged God to please take this from me so that I could sleep. Probably the first time I have ever actually done something like that, asking for a simple ease of my thoughts. I actually found that it worked. I was asleep within moments.

I love how He shows me, constantly, how nothing is too big, nor too small, for my Lord. I love how He shows me, in so many ways, that He loves me and cares for me, even down to the tiniest, smallest, most seemingly insignificant detail.

THAT is what faith is all about.

I'm learning. Slowly at times, yet still.... I am learning.